Updates

It has been quite a while since the last I updated my blog. I had been busy although i finished my exams long ago. I am currently working as a Beauty Advisor admin. Glamorous name I know, but, really, it's just an admin work.

I admit, there were difficult times working and many asked me why not go and work in a law firm. Well, I am just a mere first year student and my knowledge about law is not that thorough and I am rather sure that most lawyers will have no time to coach a freshie like me. I would rather be a second or third year student when I offer my service to a law firm, big or small.

People in the office comes from many background and have different attitudes. Some are exemplary while some are just plain annoying. Working in a rather large corporate and being one of the most lowest of the class have its advantages and disadvantages. I learned that when you are at the bottom, the ones above you will definitely try to show their superiority towards you or, in other words, bully you.

When I first worked, life is not looking good for me. Works came pouring in and people gave me cold shoulders. Heck, I even had to do some hard and dangerous work. I had to carry boxes of beauty products and arrange them, send them and etc. The boxes were heavy. Seeing me, a rather thin gal, no one in the office offered to help. They rather sit and chit chat or laugh away. Most men just walked pass me as if I am like a stone by the roadside.

There are several times I bruised myself carrying all the boxes and there are times, I broke down in tears. I had to work overtime if I am unable to finish my work. There aren't any extra payment for that, mind you.
However, I told myself, just endure it because by the end of the day, I know I will be a stronger person and the experience I gain would be priceless.

Now, I don't care if no one talks to me. I stop smiling to people who gave me sneering glances and judge me from head to toe. Heck, I even built some muscles carrying all the boxes. So what if all the men just walked pass me and ignored me while I struggled with the packages. At least now I keep in mind that not all men are gentlemen. I noticed I am getting better in my typing and admin job too.

I realised that if I would have given up a month ago, I would not be able to learn all that. Patience had indeed reward me with experience, more valuable than gold. I just hope that whatever I learned, I am able to practice it in my future undertakings.

Working life is not easy, but it is not difficult either. Some would just want to earn fast and large money and ignore their morals in life. They do not care whose money they take as long as it makes them rich. Personally,  if I want to earn big bucks, I would not have taken up this particular course. I would have pursue business or some easy course and start planning to earn big money.

I had been approached by people, introducing me to many multi-level marketing scheme, telling me I can achieve financial stability in no time. Yes, I know. But that is not something I am looking for. At this crucial age, still filled with passion in life, I want to use them before it die down. I will eventually think of earning big money but right now, I want to make my dream a reality before thinking about money. I know God will give me the income I deserve.

New Hair!

I always love curly hair, but I've been having it for 2 years. Hence, I decided to have a change. Although some say it is better now, but, I still love my old curly hair. I agree the old style made me looked older and tangled up easily. Oh well, it's time for a change also....

BEFORE

AFTER

which is better??

11 April 1012

Remember in one of my previous post, I did mention that I had difficulties posing decently in front of the camera? Well, I did try to improve my silliness and be more vain in front of the camera. I admit, I am NOT photogenic at all, but I certainly, do not want to look like a monkey in all my photos.

I would want to show some lovely pictures to my kids in the future and I don't want them to think their mom was once an ape!

After MANY attempts, I finally get a proper picture of myself.

You guys have no idea how many takes I had to go through to get a few decent pictures of myself. I am indeed, NOT camera-friendly. 

Notice I always look away from the camera?

That's because, I will make some silly face when I'm looking directly at a camera. I just cannot help myself. 

Thus, the best way for me to look good in pictures? 

LOOK AWAY from it. 

Our people and our Nation

Once again, I found myself in front of the screen, snooping around in the cyberspace, aimlessly. Life is hectic as usual, with classes, and exams are drawing near but I still cannot help clicking away here. Urgh.. Internet, What have you done to humankind?

Had Public Law lecture today, and my college had invited a guest lecturer from the UK to lecture us on that particular subject. As usual, this subject is rather dry and bulky. There's lot of technical theories to embed into our brains. We can whine all we want, but nonetheless, it must be done. We have to, by hook or by crook, memorize them. Period.

Public law relates a lot to the politics, and the government. It is undeniable that there are some similarities between how our politics and the UK politics system work. However, I would say one of the most prominent difference is the society. The people in Malaysia, sad to say, are more timid than people in other countries. We are afraid of changes and, allow me to say, the government too.

Looking at the UK government, their government were not always ruled by only one party. Their government were ruled by the Conservatives, the Labour and sometimes, the Liberal too. It all depends on the people's votes. Compared to Malaysia, we are only ruled by one particular party ever since our independence. Maybe, perhaps, we need a change?

I am not inciting any of you to go against the government. Our government, had, undeniably, developed Malaysia from a third world country to a rather developed nation. But, don't you think that if one particular power is being in charge for far too long, they'll just stop trying?! If they have the majority chair in the Parliament for far too long, wouldn't they abuse their powers? Who will check and balance their powers then? They can pass any law they want. Yes, indeed we have the Constitution to curb absurd laws to be passed but, if there's a majority of 2/3 in the house, the act in the Constitution itself, can be repealed or even amended. Who said the Constitution is supreme?!

Nevertheless, the activist can waste all their saliva in awareness campaigns and all, but if we, the people, do not want to change the current government, who can?!

Some might say that the current situation is as good as it is, but the question is, why settle for good if we can have the best? Every party has their own faults, their strength and uniqueness but, if we are too afraid of changes, we will never know how far our country can go.

Have you ever questioned, why Singapore, a country smaller than us, less resourceful than us, is much more developed and well known than us?! Well, as much as I hate to admit, their people aren't afraid to change. There's no favouritism, biasness or whatsoever. All races are equal. There's no such thing as quota in education and other fields. Even if they do, they wouldn't put the unqualified in a particular field just to fulfil the "quota". If you are good, you will be given a chance. They recognise the abilities of their people. Their government is forever trying because the people of Singapore can, and will, at any time, topple their government if they aren't satisfied with the current one.

Racism, happens everywhere in the world. Not just in our country but EVERYWHERE. Politicians often use racism to break the people apart to manipulate the situation. And, I regret to say, it works. Politicians use religion to create hatred, doubts and prejudice among us. Why can't the people realize that we are indeed played by them?!

Equality? What equality?! How can we achieve equality if we are afraid of changes? Democracy? Why would you want democracy when you are all happily submitting to your current stagnant mode? Why complain that our government is unfair, not developing, takes bribe, not up to the standards when YOU, the people DO not even want to DO something about it?

If you want Malaysia to be a better nation, then DO something about it. You can complain in the Mamak stall, at the bus stop, at the Warong, the situation will NOT change with you just talking away. Some may not even care. But let me tell you this, those who don't want to care about the future of your own nation, do NOT deserve to complain. You don't deserve to criticise your leader because you are the one who chose not to be involved. Your children have bad education? Our country's not developing, chaos? Insufficiency happen everywhere? You got no one to blame but yourself for being cowards.

It doesn't matter which party rule us. As long as the party is able to lead and improve the country, that party deserve to lead. I am very neutral and I am not a supporter of the opposition nor the government. All I can say is, may the best man win. I would, definitely, look forward to the election coming soon. Would the Malaysians be daring enough to change or continue to stay in their own comfort zone?

7 April 2012

I can feel the heat. I am at the peak of the boiling point. The amount of stress at this moment is Crazy... Just finished a 9 hours long of Public Law class today. I actually drank a glass of Nescafe (which I'll not drink no matter how tired) and a can of Redbull. I needed the energy...

My exams are in a month time and everyone are at their worst state right now. Everybody's mood are so foul that you are terrified to even talk to us. 

I have not been back home to Melaka for nearly a month. I can't even go back home for Holy Week because I have classes on this weekends and my classes are really really energy and time consuming. 9 to 6 hours per day. 

I really apologize for being such a bitch to those who tried talking or contacting me these days. I will try my best to be as nice as possible. I snap and I bite but I assure you, I'm nice.. ^.^

Forgive me pls?!

Anyway, I'm just thinking of rekindling back my childhood interest. I really love the fashion line and I love watching fashion shows and I love clothes and colours. I am just thinking, maybe.....

But then, am I being childish? Am I still living in an unrealistic teenage dream? Everyone want to be in the fashion line. Well, whatever is it, I'll still pursue my law degree and learn what I love too. I may not be as good, but I will never stop trying to be the best. 

Ps : I am still trying to be vain in front of the camera and take some decent pictures of myself. I still cannot bring myself to smile DECENTLY without making some weird expression in front of the camera...

Add caption

Now you get what i mean?!

Wow...

I am really speechless. Am i stupid or the standard of education nowadays have been lowered down? People are scoring As just like that. We studied just as hard and aren't any less smarter than them but why were our results ain't that impressive? General election coming? Well, it's just a mere allegation though.

Likewise, I personally think that our standard of education has definitely been lowered down compared to our parents' time. If you get an A those time, you'll be hailed as a freaking genius. Now, getting straight A is just like doing well in your exams. 

Nonetheless, it is a good platform to boost a person's confidence but if it gets too much, it's just giving false hope. Maybe that's why people's performance decrease after that. Received a text from an unrecognisable number from a church member saying that he is the happiest man alive because his daughter got straight As for her SPM. No offence but, I don't even know who is his daughter and I don't really favour boastful people. If I am close to your daughter, then i would feel really happy but i have no idea who is his daughter. 

After passing all the exams, all those marks didn't matter to me anymore. People do not even look at my STPM results for goodness sake. So, what's the big deal about that? Yes, you can be proud and all but even when my parents were proud of me, i didn't see them broadcasting my achievement to people. We'll just go have a nice dinner, be happy about it and life goes on. No celebration like open house or fancy parties.

My mom always tells me that " it doesn't matter how well you score in your paper but it's all about how you survive in the real world. Scoring like a boss in exams doesn't determine your future. And even if you are successful, always remember to be humble and know your roots. You are nothing without God's blessings." Those are the words which i hold on till now. 

But, i would like to congratulate those who did well and wish you guys all the best in the future undertakings. It' doesn't matter if you didn't score that well this time, but always remember that there's always another platform for you to excel in if you put your heart into it. I myself am not a star student but I am a living proof that hard work pays off if you work hard enough. But remember to have fun while you are at it...

Saturday...

The house is so quiet now. This is the best time to study but, heck, it's getting a little lonely here. Oh well, i guess i really need this quiet time to calm myself down.  

The window from where i'm sitting.

Peaceful Saturday and a good day to study. I am studying actually, but I guess, I can take a break and I really miss blogging. 

I am feeling much better now after banging my head on the wall, throwing some tantrums, shed some pathetic tears, I'm all charged up to face the books again. 

I thought this would be easy, but heck, who am i trying to kid? This is tough and I have no clue whether i can actually make it. I have to say, the only competition i have is myself. This is so different compared to the days during high school where i can laze till the last minute and still be able to pass. Right now, if i ever try doing that, it's like taking a spoon and digging my own grave. 

Nevertheless, this is the best time for me to test my limits and actually see how far i can go. No point if i have plans but i'm no capable of fulfilling them. 

I'm sorry my posts have not been an entertaining posts for you guys but i swear, after my exams, i'll be a much funnier. relax and not self-motivating person. I promisseeeee...

Anyway, got to get back to my books

 Have a pleasant weekend...

Fast Ways To Get Rich

Marry a rich, old, dying man. What else?

I cannot believe that I fell sick again. This is more stressful than I thought it will be. Of course, it's easy to say, 

"why so stress? take like easy. "

How I wish I can be like that?

Sometimes, i think i expect to much. But without expectation, i wouldn't push myself to achieve the things i dream to achieve. 

People normally give up because they look at how long their journey is instead of what they achieved. 

I am looking at the things i achieved and i will be damn if i'm giving up now.

It's not as if i don't go out and enjoy life. I do.

But right now, exams in 2 months, even if i do go out, at the back of my mind, i'm always worried. I think it's good in a way that I am goals and expectation in life.  But i pray that my health is strong enough to go through this. I cant be falling sick all the time. 

Heaven in your mouth

I had been eating a lot lately and frankly speaking, i have NO regrets or whatsoever about it. I mean, of course I'm worried that I'll suffer obesity by the age of 40 but hey, I shall go for liposuction then. Anyway, I am just pulling your legs. We all should enjoy our food but do not eat excessively/ That's when the unnecessary fats come in. That' when we develop flabby stomach and gain tremendous weight.

EAT a lot, Yes, you hear me, EAT a LOT, but, spread them into many meals. Balanced diet is the best way to stay happy. I mean, if you are healthy, you will be happy. 

 Had this with kee when she was up in KL. A Korean delicacy. The price is reasonable. This can be found in Sunway Pyramid in the Asian Avenue. 

This was a dish from TGI Friday. I had this when i was out with my bestfriends. Note that the crust was mozerella cheese. 

The meal will not be complete without some dessert ain't it? This particular desert is from Hokaido Ice-cream, the Gardens. And yeap, it taste as good as it looks 

This is my favourite. I love this dessert because there's caramel in it and I love CARAMEL!!! and look at the marshmallow. it was slightly burnt and when you put it in your mouth, it literally melted in your mouth. This can also be found in Hokaido Ice-cream. 

So, why torture yourself by abstaining from all these? You might whine about your weight but being beautiful takes hard work but that doesn't mean you can't indulge in lovely dishes. If you do, just be discipline enough to hit the gym or exercise. As i always said, a prefect body is a gift but a healthy body is a choice. 

Have a nice day drooling people!!

Rant

I really have no respect for people whom do not appreciate their lives. I mean, Yeah... Suicide may not be a coward thing to do, but if there's a solution to the problem and you just do not want to solve it, then you really deserve no respect from me.

Sometimes I wonder if you are just doing this to gain some attention? People come from broken families and gone through shit in their lives but they still persevered till today. Each and every of us is allowed to have weaknesses but even with the weaknesses, doesn't mean your life is worthless.

I am angry, yes, with those who do not appreciate their lives after going through shit. It made me really frustrated looking at you not appreciating what people had done for you. We wasted our time and energy for you and yet, you can come back and said you will do it again?

If the next time you do it again and i ignored you, will I be charged of omission? since I did assumed the duty  of care the first time you tried taking your life away. Will the court actually sentence me for manslaughter for not helping you?

Is it really fair? i tried helping and it's you whom do not appreciate what is given. People have their limitations. Hence, i advice the person who want to take their lives away, please, do not do it at my presence. Call me selfish and what not, I just do not care. You are allowed to be imperfect and weak but that does not permit you to be worthless.

I cared once but looking at you still not changing, it just disgust me. Others have relationship problems too. Others had gone through depression too but with the help form people around, they persevered. It's not as if you have no one caring for you. Instead, you are disrespectful and really really really unappreciative.

Flower Power

I know it's quite late for me to post it up, but well, i got nothing better to do now. Yes, i will go back to my books after I indulge myself in writing this particular post. 

I know girls sometimes said that they don't like flowers but honestly, boys, THEY DO. 

No matter how cold a girl can be, if she receives flowers, she'll definitely go "awwww...". 

Well, at least, that was how i acted when i received a bouquet of roses from my beau.. 

this was the first time i received any flowers from anyone and i always thought I would not really feel anything, but, I WAS WRONG.

I was really touched and my heart literally melt. 

So, boys, even if girls may say that they don't like flowers, do NOT trust them. They LOVE flowers. 

Unless, she's allergy to it. One of my housemate is actually allergic to flowers. She actually planned to have a bouquet of wedding vegetables instead of flowers. 

How unique is that?! 

maybe something like this?

or this?

No matter what... girls love flowers, or flower look-a-like (if she's allergic to it)...   

You'll melt her heart and you'll put a smile on her face for the day.

So, what are you boys waiting for? 

Go buy some nice flowers for your girl and melt her heart!!

After So Long

I finally started waking early in the morning again. I have to. My exams will be in the morning and I can't be half asleep while doing my exams. 

Thank God there's a gym, pool and sauna here. I do not have to purposely walk out to a park or find for a public pool and not to mention, it's much safer. 

This hot thing made me sweat like a pig and after every session, I feel better. I guess I sweat all my toxic out. It's easy and less tiring but GOD, it can be really hot in there. 

I love staring at this door. Made me realised that there's a door to every exit and hence, there's a solution to every problems. How random can i be?! 

Sometimes, i feel as though i'm looking at my life through the little window and I cannot help thinking how lucky am I to actually experience what i saw.

Problems always exist in our lives. Sometimes they can be solved, but sometimes, they are just never ending.    It's a thorn in the skin and a pain in the ass. 

Nonetheless, they are still there. So, it's how we handle them. I sometimes break but as long as I stand up again by the end of the day, I guess it's alright to break once in a while. I'm no wonder woman. 

Anyway, got to get going. Have a good morning...... ^.^

it doesn't matter

friends come and go. True friends stick up to each other. Even if one made a mistake, true friends forgive and reconcile. Even though we don't see each other very often, but we know, by the end of the day, we will stick up for each other.

I admit, it hasn't been a bed of roses with you guys but I know, you are always there when i need you people. I may be annoying at times and i said stuffs that may hurt you guys, but you guys never ever left me or hate me for it. You forgave me and i will to with you guys, because you are my bestfriends.

Even if others hate you or dislike you, you know you still have us. You may have your flaws but hey, who is perfect? People make mistakes and you are allowed to be imperfect. Be sure that you still have us no matter what...

They can say whatever they want, but in the end, it's our lives and we live the way we want it. They got nothing to do with it, and they can do nothing about it.